A little more than 21 years after graduating, I sat in a bar in Memphis that I would occasionally frequent in my college days, watching my alma mater play on TV while enjoying microbrews that didn’t exist (and I probably couldn’t afford) back when I was getting drunk off of Natty Light.

It was like the old times. Almost.

A quick digression.

My favorite movie of all time is Singles. If you haven’t seen it, it’s the quintessential nineties movie featuring 20-somethings in Seattle, the music that defined the era and several cameos by grunge icons.  As a college student when I watched it, it was a movie that defined the future I knew I would live in. As a middle-aged adult, though, it has become the lens through which I view my college days – those days of dreaming of what my future would look like, but not worrying much beyond the next day. Amazing friends, great music and many hangovers and skipped classes. My own great 90s movie.

I look back at Memphis with great sentimentality, sometimes wondering what it would have been like had I never left 20-plus years ago. I even occasionally catch myself looking at real estate websites to check out houses there. I don’t think I do it seriously, but just a small desire to return to that place where everyone was figuring it all out and having a blast doing it. 

Which brings me back to that bar 21 years later sitting by myself, enjoying a small, distorted slice of an earlier life, but missing my current one back in Indianapolis. Realizing that I didn’t miss Memphis after all. I missed a moment. 

The places in your life are really just moments in your life. You can go back to that physical place, but the moment is gone. Which is not to be a downer. You’re creating new moments every day that you’ll one day miss. The only reason you appreciate them is that they’ll never happen again. Which is probably a great gift in itself.